April 11, 2018

By Mark Faris “The Coast Bard”

She had a ventriloquist dummy perched like a parrot on her shoulder. And it looked a little like her. Actually, a lot like her. Smoother complexion. And a bit more rigid. But the similarity was undeniable.

Otherwise, there was nothing particularly unusual about the cross-eyed blonde who moseyed into COAST digs on Whitehead Street the other day.

She seemed to relish the attention her little ringer commanded. And when the focus reached a peak, the mannequin’s head turned and the mouth moved.

“What are you guys looking at?” the synthetic little chick seemed to bark. ‘What?”


The crack immediately triggered raised eyebrows and startled yuks. The desired effect had been achieved. And the woman introduced her “sister,” Ginger.

There is no shortage of such interesting characters who find their way onto our Bahama Village premises. And it’s always a treat checking out the mix of nationalities and personalities that find their way to Mile Marker 0 for a taste of paradise.

For the most part, they are a curious bunch, draped in their idea of subtropical cruise wear while spouting queries regarding the island, its history and countless idiosyncrasies. Often as not there are questions, too, about the origin of our very own single syllable monicker.

“Coast,” we tell them is as much a concept as it is an appellation.

It is languid, sun-drenched sea breezes. Crashing surf and burning sand. Snowy white clouds billowing in deep azure sky. And tourists spontaneously bursting into flame beneath the blistering rays of the big bright star that illuminates our days.

It is kindness and sincerity, too. With generous portions of sauntering, laidback, what’s-the-rush ambience. Lots of music. And no shortage of humor, either.

At least that’s the way we see it. And it’s a sense we try to infuse in our line of island art and apparel.

Descriptions are illusive. But if COAST was a restaurant, the blue plate special would feature surf ‘n’ turf, key lime pie an icy cold Modelo. And maybe a side of conch fritters. To go.

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